This Is My Life...
This is my life now, and people don't understand how to deal with it.
Recently, I was put on more prednisone, and it's making me bonkers...per usual, you might think, but it's more so this time. I don't know why, but it is. Maybe, it's because my body is just getting over the 4 month dose...or maybe, it's just the way my body is going to react to it from now on. Either way, it sucks.
Anyway, what's really getting to me is the fact that people act like it's my fault when I freak out, and then pretend as though nothing happened afterward (when they're the ones who set me off). Another thing is that these same people pretend like everything is fine with me. Like my body isn't trying to kill itself slowly, and when something goes wrong in life, they think that I can handle it by myself, and don't offer to help.
Today, is the perfect example of that...
I went to go get my blood work done for this enzyme test, so I can be able to take this new drug, 6mp. Yippie!
Anyway, everything was going fine, until I decided to go to Barnes and Noble (yes, I'm a nerd), to get my ice tea. Well, I get back from inside, get into my car, and try to turn her over...
I recently got a new/used 2007 Dodge Charger, and she was acting up a little when I started her. I thought maybe it was the battery, and when I suggested this to certain people, they told me that I just didn't understand how Chargers worked, and that everything was perfectly normal.
Turns out my instincts were spot on, and when I turned her over today, she did that classic clicking noise and died on me.
What does a person do?
Meanwhile, I have to deal with these same people yelling and screaming at me over the phone.
Now, I'm not feeling too great to begin with, but everything is okay..."Just take a breath! Chill! Shit happens!"
Normaly, I would chill, but we just got this car, I'm hopped up on steroids and I got one person telling me to take the car one place, and the other telling me to take it somewhere else.
"But don't get upset, Laura Marie. It's not worth it!"
Like you didn't just leave me stranded without the possibility of even coming to help. Did you perhaps have something else to do today? No! You were off. Okay. No prob. Take a breath. Shit happens.
You want to wonder why I freak out?
You want to know why my stomach is ten times worse?
I got people trying to hit, and strangle me because I get on their nerves when I have one of my freak out episodes. Making me feel like the whole world is closing in on me. I mean, it's not like uncontrollable mood swings is part of the steroid use. It's no big deal. Don't worry about it. Take a breath. Shit happens.
Anyway, the AAA guy finally shows up, after thirty minutes, tells me it's the battery (No shit, Sherlock!), and explains to me that I have to take it to a mechanic because the battery is by the back tire.
Okay, no problem.
So, I take it to the place that I usually go to, with my grams, and we have to drop it off. Then we have to wait for someone to pick us up. But don't worry, Laura Marie. It's okay if your heart races if you stay out in the heat too long. No prob. Take a breath. Shit happens.
I finally get home and it all hit me. This is my life now. Just one thing after another. Everything going down in the toilet (literally) as fast as possible. I can't focus on my work, I can barely move because of the swelling and every pound I gain, my body feels like it might actually explode. My neck is so swollen right now that I can barely move it, and my legs are beginning to not work properly. But, ya know, don't worry, Laura Marie. Stop acting like this! I don't understand why you're having a fit! You just stop it right now! No prob. TAKE A BREATH! SHIT HAPPENS!
(UPDATE: Just got a phone call...worse than the battery...it's the starter. Yippie!)